Sweet Valley High – #63 The New Elizabeth & 80’s Big Hair especially 80’s Perms, I give Jess and Liz a makeover!

Near the middle of the completely bizarre and delightfully
daffy Sweet Valley High Book #62 Who’s Who – Liz decides to do
something daring – throwover Todd for Rick Anderson? No. Start a
heavy metal band called the Wacky Khakis? No. Liz perms her luscious
shoulder length locks throwing everyone for a loop. But only momentarily
cause by book #63 The New Elizabeth , the
tone turns to ridicule – right from the opening sentense – ”
Watch out, everyone! Here comes Elizabeth Wakefield, the trend
-setting fashion queen of Sweet Valley High, with her daring
new perm,”Lila Fowler announced. The New Elizabeth , for me,
has to be one of the most asinine Sweet Valley High books
simply because it railroads Liz with her perm to try
and strive to do something more audacious , more daring
and since we’re in California – more cliche – bring on
the surfboards. Considering this was 1990 right on the cusp
of a new decade –
why not handgliding or bungee jumping if only to pose the
cover art question to James Mathewuse – Do you dare to
paint Liz upside down? Not that I mind surfing it’s a little
boring but since there is skill involved I minded Liz
surfing. Jessica would’ve been more fun – shooting the waves,
running over Bruce with her surfboard, losing her bikini top
or something! But Liz, being Liz , masters whatever
sport , hobby or musical instrument she picks up to
the point where she’s caught the romantic eye of her
teenage instructor Sean who gives her a little silver
surfboard charm. Meanwhile forgotton Laurie , Sean’s
we’re just-friends galpal, has been trying to get him
to notice her for ages and ,of course, secretly practising
her surfing in order to impress him She even
hopes to win the upcoming surf competition for beginners.
Unfortunately for her , Liz is entering and Laurie obviously
doesn’t stand a chance. It’s
the moment Liz has been waiting for , all her friends
have gathered at the beach for her surprize (
they had no idea she had been surfing but thought she
was doing some stodgey, biology assignment) – her name
is called as one of the competitors – instant pandemonium!
and then – the writer steps in – Far be it that
Liz ever loses – no! Liz can fall back on her
old realiable, dependable self – the old Liz and
throw the competition but Laurie could never win
against Liz. That’s my main reason for disliking this
book everyone kinda mullycoddles Liz ( and always has – pesky old
boyfriend Jeffery making things awkward – that’s
okay we won’t mention him again! ) Liz feeling terrific
about her good deed, landing a bellyflop so
Laurie can win, takes her ribbing like a
good Samaritan for everyone seen her wipe out and
now hoots imagine Liz hanging ten! Too funny!
Of course Laurie manages to finally attrack Sean
but the reader has to think of him as something
of a bit of a jerk if it takes a thrown competition
for him to finally notice what was right under his
If it wasn’t for the
side story this , for me, would be a complete wipe out
( sorry couldn’t resist!) – fortunately Jess up to her old
tricks manages to create some laughs executing revenge against
Caroline Pearce for blabbing about Jessica’s previous
books escapades as Magenta Galaxy and Denise Fromage
( I wonder if she pronounced it as Fromage or as
Fro-mah-gshay? Either way it’s hilarious to think even
Jessica called herself cheesey! ) Discovering that
Caroline Pearce has a job at a pricey boutique the
Unique Boutique , Jessica and Lila set about
making Caroline’s job impossible, usually playing
disgruntled shoppers, dismantling
carefully folded clothes. Fortunatley Jessica finally
gets her just desserts. After Caroline helps Jessica
into a change room with her arms full of clothes , she
absconds with Jessica’s clothes and quits her job
leaving Jess stranded in her underwear!

Reading about Liz’s perm made me think of some truly
outrageous 80’s curls. I mean some of them looked like
skinned poodle wigs , others the electro-shock-therapy
look , others simply defy desciptions. I dug
up some pictures of truly awful 80’s big hair and
was fooling with photo shop to see what Jessica would
look like with 80’s big hair – Pretty Good actually.

I took the photo from Double Love , I also decided to see
what Liz would look like had she gone the opposite route
– in 1990 – Ghost had given Demi Moore’s gamin-bangs
tops on trendy lists it was the ultimate
in short-do’s. I gave Liz a similar look – I tried it
both ways one with bangs –

one without –

She has a nice slender neck giving her a real dainty look. I
also used Double Love’s image for her. Hope you like the pics
one is an ad in one of my brother’s old hot rod magazines.

The ones where the models all wear puffy hair, smiles, bathing
suits and running shoes?! I think this model used a whole
can of Bold Hold – speaking of which I love the 1989 ad
in which a man acts like his brute strength couldn’t
budge that mop.

But both of these models hair are
gorgeous compared to my other lovelies – check out
the poodle tower! Beehive is right! I expect eyes to
suddenly blink from that shameless mass.

And the other teased
hair-don’t? Where did she safari in a cyclone? Or does
does animal print automatically conjure up a shock-therapy
lion’s mane as style?!

At least Epic Waves and Conair knew what they’re doing – love!love!love! those
kinky curls accented with a little mini-sprout ponytail – Back in the late 80’s it was the ultimate fun-loving
hairstyle. Click here for my favorite 80’s
perm commercial by Ogilvie. Love the actress when she says Wroooong!

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